There is a solution
What if you were no longer reactive, blurting out whatever comes to mind, or shutting down for no reason? What if instead you could feel calmer inside, able to respond instead of reacting, not taking life personally but able to take things in stride? What if you knew what you were feeling when you feeling it? What if your body was a source of information instead of something to avoid?
There is a path out of suffering
Learn the fundamentals to be Safely Embodied
I learned the hard way
Iām Deirdre Fay, originator of the Becoming Safely Embodied approach for healing trauma, author and co-author of three books on healing trauma and attachment. And Iām completely invested in helping you heal from trauma, which I know is possible when you learn to stay safe and connected to your body.
When my own trauma history came up out of the blue back in the 1980s I had no idea what to do. And that was despite living in yoga ashram where I was practicing yoga and meditation multiple times a day! I went from being comfortable in my body to never wanting to leave my room, let alone the comforter on my bed.
And yet, I knew from all the wisdom traditions I had been immersed in that there had to be a way out. If every tradition I knew of (east and west) said there was a path out of suffering, that the body was a place of refuge and guidance – well then, darn it all, I was going to find a way. And I did.
After I found my way to healing, I knew I wanted to help others as well.
In the late 1990’s while I was working and supervising at Bessel van der Kolk’s Trauma Center I created the Becoming Safely Embodied skills that were derived from the ways I found to heal my own trauma. Since then I’ve written two books and coauthored another on this embodied approach to healing.
More than writing books, though, what’s most important to me is finding simple ways to help others take steps to feel safer in their body, calming their minds, and opening their hearts.
Over the last 20 plus years I’ve lead thousands of people in the Becoming Safely Embodied skills course. I’m always looking for ways to give you as much as I can and spread the material as widely as possible because I believe too many people are suffering so much when healing and resolution is possible.
What I’ve come to absolutely believe is that trauma, as it disrupts our ability to be safely embodied is NOT about driving us into the uninterrupted pain of life but it IS a doorway to open our hearts to compassion. But we need to have a map and my goal is always to provide you with the step by step process to get you to where you want to go.
If you’re anything like me, and the so many I’ve worked with these past 20 plus years, You’ve probably had all these experiences or something similar. IN the wake of trauma, we often feel stuck, trapped, hopeless, caught in the pain and doubting it’s possible to change. The muck of life feels insurmountable.
And yet it’s absolutely possible to learn the steps to change so that you’re not stuck and trapped in pain. You can use these skills in five minutes a day or better yet, develop a habit of using them five minutes multiple times a day – that can put you a new path to healing.
I know healing is possible, since I have made my own healing journey and have helped others one on one to heal as well as teaching these skills and methods to healers all over the world who tell me of the many positive changes they see in their clients after putting the approach into practice.
One of my students, Joan wrote me recently about her experience using some of these skills in her own healing: Practicing self-compassion is becoming less of a struggle. I’m learning to be much more aware of body sensations. Listening and talking to my parts is so beneficial [as is separating facts from interpretation] not sure that I’ll be covering it in this basics course. Feeling my spine when paying attention to my breath somehow gives me a healthy boundary – something about me being me matters. I don’t have to merge into the background, if that makes sense. So thank you Deirdre. It’s really encouraging!
Let me lead you in this short Six Sides of the Breath audio practice now.
Plus, you can download it and use it any time you like.
And because the neuroscience research validates over and over again that the more we practice the more new neural pathways grow, I recommend that you use this exercise daily until it becomes a new pattern available to you at a moment’s notice when needed.
I’m putting together a short course on the Fundamentals of Safely Embodied which introduces you to many of the concepts and exercises for gently and effectively moving on from trauma.
It’s going to be made of short (5-15 minute) videos, short enough for you to watch in the midst of your everyday, probably busy life.
But before I go, I’ll ask you to take a moment and leave a comment below about what your biggest challenge or struggle in the wake of trauma has been. Or what has been more discouraging on your post-trauma journey.
Reading and responding to your comments helps me to make sure that what I’m talking about is relevant and helpful to you.
In the next few days I’m going to be letting you know how to overcome the blocks to healing that most of us face.
That’ll in a few days and will “see” you then.
In the meantime, if you know someone else who could benefit from having some help in healing from trauma, send them this link to the signup page so they’ll get the help they want.
And please leave me a comment below.